Another post that came across my feed referred to not having a runner's body, but having the right mindset/heart for being a runner and that this was good enough. Well...how about this: If you have a body and you run then you have a runner's body? What's wrong with that? Why do we think we have to apologize for not looking the "right" way in order to be allowed to do certain things or wear certain clothes, or think certain thoughts? Why can't we just say "I'm a runner." "I'm going to wear a bikini.""I AM WHATEVER I DO, NO MATTER WHAT MY BODY LOOKS LIKE!" Yes I was yelling on purpose.
One of my areas of professional focus is on eating disorders and body image concerns. The straight jacket in which many of us (men and women) live is seriously tight. We are bombarded by a slew of messages reminding us that unless we look the exact right way, then we should not do certain things or wear certain clothes. Or what? The fashion police will issue a citation? Make an arrest? Well, a lot of people have deputized themselves as officers of fashion and/or of behavioral law and order. They go out of their way to point out what we're doing wrong despite the fact that what we're doing has NOTHING to do with them whatsoever. They don't like it so you shouldn't like it. And if you do, you should feel like crap about it.
What is wrong with people?!
Why on earth can't we leave each other alone unless we are offering care and support? Of course some deputies believe that is exactly what they're doing. "I'm saving them a lot of embarrassment. So...what I'm doing is a good thing." Bullshit! Butt out and mind your own business! My apologies for the rant, but this is one of the things that really gets my blood boiling.
What we can do to combat this is to not let others dictate what we do and how we feel. We get to decide. I'm suggesting that it is necessarily easy to brush off the comments of others. It can be really difficult, especially if those comments come from those who are important to us. But we still get to decide whether or not such comments stop us from doing what we had intended on doing all along.
I would like to challenge you all to do what my students (I'm also a college professor) have been recently challenged to do. As part of my course on eating disorders, they have been challenged to think of things they do not do because of how they perceive their bodies - and then do it anyway!! This is not easy especially with all of the self appointment pseudo law enforcement officials out there. I haven't met with them again to know how it went, but I challenge you to do the same. Consider what you have not done or are not doing because according to others you don't look exactly right. Is this something you WANT to do? Then, in my opinion, I think this is precisely what you ought to do. You're allowed to wear a bathing suit, or to wear fitted/tight clothing if you what to even if your body is shaped in a way that makes you or others say "You know. You really shouldn't wear that." Again...BS!
Life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness. We're all allowed to pursue this. Feel free to look away if you don't like the look of my post child bearing 42-year-old bathing suit clad body. I'm going swimming!!
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I would like to challenge you all to do what my students (I'm also a college professor) have been recently challenged to do. As part of my course on eating disorders, they have been challenged to think of things they do not do because of how they perceive their bodies - and then do it anyway!! This is not easy especially with all of the self appointment pseudo law enforcement officials out there. I haven't met with them again to know how it went, but I challenge you to do the same. Consider what you have not done or are not doing because according to others you don't look exactly right. Is this something you WANT to do? Then, in my opinion, I think this is precisely what you ought to do. You're allowed to wear a bathing suit, or to wear fitted/tight clothing if you what to even if your body is shaped in a way that makes you or others say "You know. You really shouldn't wear that." Again...BS!
Life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness. We're all allowed to pursue this. Feel free to look away if you don't like the look of my post child bearing 42-year-old bathing suit clad body. I'm going swimming!!
Like what you read? Want to read more but don't want to have to keep coming back? Subscribe now! You can get SelfStrong delivered to your RSS reader or delivered right to your email inbox. You choose! Both options are available on the top right of this page.
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